One of these days...

I'm going to (a) win something and (b) restart my world famous competition website. Until then have a go at these even if you don't want the prizes (you can give them to me).

HP/Compaq Tablet PC
DAB Digital Radio
Dell Latitude D600 Laptop

Category:

• Competitions

Health Update 29

As you can see, I'm back after a little break. Nothing major wrong just that things were getting on top of me so I didn't post for a while. As for my announcement that I was going to follow the teaching of Dr Gillian McKeith I have an update.

I did a bit of research to garner opinion of the book and her nutrional diets etc. I discovered a few things which aren't really explained in the Channel 4 program, namely the amount of recommended supplements you are required to take. Now surely if she has created a healthy balanced diet you should be getting the vast majority of your required mineral, vitamins and fibre etc from the food. Not so it would appear. Those who follow her diet must rattle for all the pills and powders she recommends you take in addition to the "food". I looked at a week long menu of the crap she recommends (see her website). There is no meat (apart from fish) no bread, protein, starch, carbohydrates... nothing but leaves, nuts and berries. Bollocks to that, that is unhealthy in my opinion and backed up by the amount of pills you need to pop in addition. I'm sure it has great short term results but not for me certainly in the long term.

I have however started to eat a lot more healthier. I take a packed lunch to work (and stick to it). Lots of fibre, salad, chicken. Yes I still have the odd chocy biscuit but lets not get carried away here. I do feel better this past week with a bit more energy. I shall continue to chart my own course to recovery.

Category:

• Health
• Weight

Scammers

So there I am sitting at my desk working away like a good 'un (the only person in the office in a building that used to hold 600 workers) and the phone rings. Strange, thinks me, we haven't had a phonecall in weeks, who could it be?

Scammer: "Hello, could I speak to the MD please?"
Me: "Sorry he's out of the country, can I help?" (I feel that as I'm the only one there I should give myself a little promotion).
Scammer "Yes, I'm Karen from Domainia a domain registration company."
Me: "...and?"
Scammer "We have a customer that wants to register your company name with different domains like .co.uk, .net, .info. As you already hold the .com we thought it was a little strange that he wanted to do this."
Me:"...and...?" (little alarm bells going off in my head)
Scammer "Well, there is no knowing what sort of websites he may host with these domains very similar to yours."
Me: *gasp* "You're right, what can we do to protect our good name?"
Scammer "We could register these domain names for you to protect them from misuse."
Me: "Brilliant, I'd never have thought of that. I'll need to speak to the boss to get the go ahead. Can I ring you back? What's your number?"
Scammer "Certainly sir, my number is 0847 ... ... but please be quick or we will have to honour our other customer's order"
Me: "Thanks again Karen, it's lucky you called. I'll call you back in 15 minutes with the credit card details."
Scammer: "You're welcome."
*Click*

A very simple scam and one I'm sure is very successful with the level of ignorance there is in the workplace. As we are ultimately owned by a multi-billion dollar US company I'd just love to see our lawyers eat these snivelling rodents alive.

Category:

• Domain
• Hosting
• Internet

Health Update 28

Right! The gloves are off. As I sit here watching this week's fat bastard on Channel 4's "You Are What You Eat I can no longer deny that I am that fat bastard. For too long I have hidden behind the comfort blanket that I'm ill with ME/CFS. Yes I'm ill but the state I've got myself into will put me in the grave in double quick time and nobody has ever died of ME/CFS.

I don't smoke and I don't drink so I'm not as bad as some of the lard arses that have been on this program over the weeks but the transformation of the latest victim was truly amazing. He could eat an entire Shepherd's Pie in 15 minutes, what was he doing for the last 10 minutes was what popped through my mind? Pure laziness, lack of effort, poor show, I didn't even see a pudding to follow, light-weight.

So I swear I will embark on a low fat, high fibre diet in an attempt to kick start my life back into some sort of normality. First thing to do is buy Dr Gillian McKeith's book full of advice and lovely recipes for steamed bean mash, hmmm lovely. If you don't hear an update from me on this then please hound me daily about when I'm going to begin. The world can't afford to lose me, there's only so many geniuses to go around.

Category:

• Health
• Weight

Service Pack Update

The inevitable "I told you so" post. As I expected it is now being reported, as the update is rolled out, just what a mess it can make of your perfectly working computer. Sure, you have to configure your firewall for different programs but this is really at the limit of the casual home user's ability. How do they know if svchost.exe should be allowed to access the internet or not? Wouldn't it have been better for Microsoft to configure the firewall automatically based on a hard disk scan of the users computer to at least minimise the head scratching? Particularly when a lot of the listed programs affected are Microsoft's own. Like I said, steer well clear for a few weeks.

Category:

• Microsoft
• Computer

Book or Film?

I don't usually get involved in the debate about which is better the book or the film (as I'm not a great reader anymore) but the release of the second installment in the Jason Bourne franchise has prompted me to comment.

I stumbled upon Robert Ludlum (the author) and his books may years ago and have re-read his best works many times since and rate The Bourne Identity in the top 5. A cracking read, the first time I actually read the book straight through the night as I could not put it down, with more plot twists than my tiny brain could accommodate. A cliche yes but in this case it was true. The film of the same name is only loosely based on the actual novel, and you could argue a more accurate description of the film is that the character is based on the book rather than a cinematic version of it. The whole premise of the book depends on the amnesia and also the reason for Bourne's existence. He's not just some assassin that the U.S. seem to locate in all the major cities of the world, he has got a specific mission which he tries to successfully conclude as the only possible way of getting his real identity back. The battle between his bosses (U.S. Secret Service), the actual target of his mission and his own amnesia is thrilling.

While I did enjoy the film (I watched the original again last night on DVD) I would urge you to read the books. Starting with The Bourne Identity then The Bourne Supremacy and concluding with the slightly disappointing The Bourne Ultimatum. Sadly since Ludlum's death and the success of the film some no-mark has written a fourth book based on the character but I would leave that well alone.

If you like the first 2 books in the Bourne series I would suggest checking out The Matrese Circle (the first Ludlum book I read), The Holcroft Covenant and The Parsifal Mosaic, all great reads and I could go on with more, steer clear of his later work though.

The Bourne trilogy

Category:

• Book
• Film

Service Pack

Microsoft have finally released the much anticipated Service Pack 2 for the Windows XP operating system after a delay of about 14 months from when it was first expected. Ever the early adopter my pal Ian has already downloaded and installed the mountainous glut of code and you can read about his experience here. Personally I'm waiting until the dust settles. I've read a few reports that it has an impact on the boot time of a machine when installed. As my beast is not connected to the internet and is working perfectly I'll hold off a while longer. Also a first chance to see what Dell's support has to say about installing it as there are also a number of known hardware and software issues (and probably some known unknowns). Proceed at your own risk.

Category:

• Microsoft
• Computer

Search Tip

Here is a little tip I saw on a discussion board to maybe help a bit with your Google searches. I've checked their site but don't see it mentioned anywhere in their advanced search section.

When searching for files with an explicit file type/extension you can search the web by using the following search string:

-0011111 filetype:yourfiletype

So, for example, I was searching for the native 3D scene files of Blender which are .blend files so I typed -0011111 filetype:blend. You have to rely on the actual filename as this will give results listing the files with no html reference. I find it useful when searching for obscure example files.

Category:

• Internet
• Google
• Search

Fitba

Less than an hour to go before kick off in Glasgow Rangers biggest match in the history of the club (since the last biggest match) and I'll make a prediction. Not about the outcome of our Euro campaign (which is obvious) not about the destination of the SPL title (sadly that will be staying where it is come next May) but of the old firm managers.

I predict that come the opening match of next season's SPL (assuming Rangers avoid relegation) both Glasgow Rangers and Celtic will have new managers. Alex McLeish will be sacked from Rangers after another dismal season. To be honest the job is now impossible and the slide of Rangers into the financial abyss will make the Leeds United debacle look like a well run club.

Martin O'Neill will make the move to Manchester United and will fail for the first time in his managerial career. The writing is on the wall for Manchester United, their time has been and gone.

Rest easy. My predictions never come to pass but they usually don't miss by much.

Chick Young's Voicemail
Martin O'Neill's Voicemail

Category:

• Sport
• Football
• Rangers

So long old friend

Sadly I have to report that our much beloved fish, called "Fish", has departed this mortal coil. He will be sadly missed. Fish was a 6 year old Shubunkin of fair size who lived in the sun lounge. Never any trouble to look after he was a great little pet with a personality to match. Do not believe those scientist types that will tell you their brains are so small they only have a memory of 4 seconds. Fish knew who we were and always welcomed us in the morning. He hated the ornaments in his tank and always knocked them over, no matter how you did it he would rearrange the stones just as he liked them and if his tank got dirty he'd clean the glass just so he could catch your attention.

Fish, you leave fond memories and will be sadly missed.

Category:

• Personal
• Pets

Health Update 27

On holiday again for a few days and boy do I need them. Feeling reasonably refreshed after my week off I quickly deteriorated when back at work. When I'm on holiday and the weekends I always need an afternoon nap, it may be only an hour or so but if I don't get it I suffer badly.

Lesley is in the wars again this time with a smashed wisdom tooth. After an emergency dental appointment to have it removed she, of course, got an infection. A very uncomfortable weekend where she couldn't sleep and was in constant pain things are only beginning to settle down now. Never a break.

Still no word from the hospital about an appointment so it's off to the doctors for a spot of queue jumping with my work's medical insurance. Needs must.

Category:

• Health
• ME
• CFS

Blender 2.34

It's out! The new release of the best free modeling/raytracing/animation application is available for download. Check it out. Also available is the new release of Yafray which has now been tightly integrated into Blender for even better rendering quality.

Beautiful, just beautiful. The full change log for the Blender 2.34 can be read here. Look at those new Ramp Shaders, and the new UV unwrapping tool and the particle effects and Yafray with caustics, oh yes.

Category:

• 3D
• Blender
• Yafray

Glesga

Glasgow is my fourth most favourite city in all the world, I like to think of it as Belfast with knives instead of guns. For those of you who have never been, or those that miss the place then get yourself over to the Glasgow Survival Guide for some pure dead brilliant entertainment, quality man.

Check out the toy section and learn the lingo from the purple nedosaur, personal favourites are V, B, P and Bazza Ferguson's very own, F. I just love the Glesga banter. See if you can spot the git that mugged you in the gallery of Neds and be prepared for the next time by choosing a weapon of your very own.

Category:

• Glasgow

Health Update 26

Back at work for a couple of days now. I was very tired last night and had to go to bed early. Amazing how just a week away from the place and your body shuts down into holiday mode so quickly. I'm off again next week for 3 days so I'll start to ease back tomorrow as Friday approaches. Bonus this week is that the boss is on holiday. Nice. Still no word from the hospital consultant about investigating my blood results. Hmmm. Other than that feeling OK.

Category:

• Health
• Liver
• Blood

Essential Albums 1

The start of a new, hopefully regular, feature whereby I will attempt to inject some culture into the lives of my millions of readers.

Music is something which used to play a very important part in my life. Those difficult teenage years (which lasted well into my thirties) were soundtracked by many artists and songs and studied in great depth while lying on my bed with the hi-fi blaring. Today, music is something that is listened to on the go, in a highly compressed format whether it be the radio, MP3s, TV or whatever. I've lost the joy of listening to music. It is something I intend to remedy sometime in the future. Yes readers, I have once again contracted the most deadliest of diseases, more commonly known as the Hi-Fi bug. Nothing on earth can reduce a man to a quivering, penniless wreck than the thought of Hi-Fi. I used to be seriously into Hi-Fi and once possessed a decent set-up (2 grands worth around 1987). Strangely my interest declined when I actually started working as a Design Engineer for a world leading British loudspeaker company. Sitting in the R&D demo room listening to roughly 80,000 quids worth of top gear I realised I'd never posses anything as good as that, and the bug was exorcised from my body. I content myself now listening to CDs or MP3s on the computer, or the radio in the car but never do I sit down and listen to music, eyes shut drinking in every nuance of audio pleasure. This will have to change.

And so to the point of this post. Hi-Fi food. Music. I count myself as one of the fortunate ones. My taste in music has been formed over many years, each purchase thoughtfully researched and studied. As a result my taste is impeccable. I will dispense this advice now[1].

There is an advert on at the moment, I don't know what it's advertising as the music it contains causes me to drift off to a bygone age when I was young. The Undertones (My Perfect Cousin). The joy. You'll know their greatest hit "Teenage Kicks" and rightfully it is regarded as a complete classic by many including John Peel who names it as the greatest ever. So my first lesson in your musical education is buy The Best of the Undertones (Teenage Kicks). They're all there: My Perfect Cousin, Teenage Kicks, Here Comes the Summer, Mars Bars etc.

I can't listen to it now without getting all dewy-eyed. And if I play it on the radio, I have to segue it into the front of another record because I can't speak after I've heard it."
JOHN PEEL on 'TEENAGE KICKS

I challenge anybody not to love this. While you're at it check out the Official Undertones website. 30 second clips of all the songs can be found there along with great quotes from celebs on the music.

[1] Bonus point for recognising the reference.

Category:

• Music
• Undertones